Joys & Challenges
As our season for living on the land is winding down and we will soon be heading south for the winter, perhaps this is a good time to reflect back on the last few months and speak to some of our joys & challenges. And since I dig making lists:
Joys
Getting to know (& see & hear!) our local animal neighbors
The quietude of living in the woods without close human neighbors
Taking dirt road drives to check out our new surroundings
Having so many friends & family come to visit!
Simplifying and scaling down our way of living
Our nearby swimming hole on the Clark Fork river
Our nearby huckleberry picking spot
Seeing our hermitage (small cabin) come to life
Harnessing solar energy into a power source
Having a grocery store, hardware store, laundromat & a diner located 10-minutes away
Being surrounded & held by so many lovely trees
Having what we call chip parties, where we eat chips and watch DVD’s we rent from the library on our laptop in the van before going to bed at night
The ease of access to our property; having a great quality, county maintained gravel road; the old concrete train bridge (circa 1914) that serves as the entryway to our road
Living in a county with no building codes and having the ability & freedom to build alternative structures
Challenges
Not having cell service or wi-fi acess on the land
Triple-digit-degree days
Figuring out & managing all of the new logistics in regard to how to live on the land and in the woods, without structures or services
Having our storage unit located 90-minutes away
Having an hour-long drive home on Monday nights after sangha
Being inundated for a spell with horse flies, wasps & yellowjackets
Not having a “real” bed (Mike’s not been sleeping well in the van)
Not having a “real” shower (we have a solar shower but its use is weather dependent)
We have a lot of good usable land but there’s only walking access to most of it; cutting in roads will take some time/know-how/machinery/money
Not the Best & Not the Worst
Living under large, industrial power lines, which make a near constant light static/buzzing sound, and a loud humming noise after it rains
Living in a canyon, which limits the amount of sunlight we have for solar power and access to the nearby cell tower
Living in bear country (bear proofing our food & trash storage is important)
The dustiness factor of our road
Not being able to work my remote job from the land (cuz no 4G or wi-fi
Operating with a bare bones kitchen set up
Operating with a bare bones tool & workshop set up
These feel like fairly comprehensive lists, though I’m sure I’ve forgotten some stuff.
People often ask me if I’m excited or happy to be doing what we’re doing, knowing we were searching for land for a long time and also that starting a mindfulness practice center has been a long-held vision of ours. I find it difficult to answer these questions, as I have trouble whittling the landscape of human emotions down to a single sentiment. Many folks seem disappointed that I am unable to match the enthusiasm they have for us. What can I say? I’m a complicated gal. I’d much rather people ask: How does it feel to be doing what you’re doing vs Are you excited?! Are you just sooo happy?! If someone were to ask me that question, and then also allowed me some time to answer in an unhurried way, here’s what I’d say: There have been, and continue to be, joys & challenges. There are also things that are not the best and not the worst. In any given day, regardless of what’s going on, I experience a range of ever-changing & mixed emotions - just like we all do.
Thing is, nothing is inherently good or bad. And in the context of one global day, no one daily rotation is all the way great or all the way terrible. Each and every moment is new and different and full of possibility. I know, it’s not satisfying for many of us to hear this kind of existential response to a question when we just want a short, quick reply. But here’s the thing, one-word answers to any version of the “How are you?” question are basically nonsense. No one can adequately sum up the entirety of what it means to be a human being on any given day, let alone during a life-changing situation they’re undergoing, in a few choice words.
How has this whole land buying/off-grid land living/big new life change thing been going, you ask? Well, I’ll tell you. It’s been hella stressful and hella amazing and everything in between. It’s been hard and fun and lovely and terrifying. It’s impossible to put just one label on it. In true fashion of what it means to be alive and human, all labels apply, and no amount of labels can suffice.